Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
