Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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