Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
