i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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