it was like his penis was on wheels.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
