its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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