Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I wish I only lived at night.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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