we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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