I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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