they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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