I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
