he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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