Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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