She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize