I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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