i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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