i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
