So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
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