found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
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