I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
