I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
