How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
