that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
