Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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