wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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