well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
