He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
We left the knife in your bed.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
