There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
