"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
