glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
