So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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