I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Randomize
