I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Your dad touched me again.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
