Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
