I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
im on a boat
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