Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
