so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
3pm strippers are depressing
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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