you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
