Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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