The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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