Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
