omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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