We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
My breasts were aching with rage.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
