I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Im part way to drunk.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize
