he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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