I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
