I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
