I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
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