it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
