I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
