at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
